You Will Never Get Love From Someone Who Does Not Love Themselves
Water cannot be spilled from an empty bowl. In other words, you cannot get something out of anything…
Probably one of the most universal truths in this world is that you cannot pour water from an empty bowl. This in the literal and figurative sense of the word serves as a reminder that “you cannot squeeze water out of stone.”
In other words, you cannot get something out of nothing. It’s the same as trying to pay the bill when there is not a dime in your bank account.
But we are used to ignoring this truth, especially when it comes to romantic relationships. As in the case of the examples mentioned above, if a person does not love himself, then how can you expect him to find love in himself to give it to you?
And I’m not talking about the “love” that you show in the morning, standing in front of the mirror. As for me, this is an artificial feeling designed to compensate for the lack of real self-confidence.
I consider self-love (no matter how fashionable it sounds) as a form of calm satisfaction. Like the satisfaction that you carry in yourself every day. Like the ability to feel whole and happy without relying on external sources of happiness like your home, car, apartment in the city, fashion watches, Louboutins or relationships.
Many of us now and then try to “fix” someone or something. We think that we can become those who finally help another person see the light at the end of the tunnel. Those who help him get to the surface. Those who will help him to reveal himself and follow his dream in order to live a meaningful life. But here is a cruel truth: you will not succeed.
You cannot fill the gaps between the existing reality of another person and his potential future. If for this he requires your presence in his life, then his actions and intentions will be insincere. If you find yourself incompatible, then, in the long run, the situation for each of you will be even more unpleasant, because you will be emotionally exhausted, and he will return to where he started.
The only way people can come together to form a mutually beneficial and satisfactory relationship is when they are both quite happy with their lives before they meet.
Otherwise, the unfortunate person will shift the responsibility for creating his happiness to you. You will become for him the only source of this happiness, its satisfaction and its meaning in life.
It is one thing to be needed by someone, but completely different is to be responsible for the very reason for its existence. This is not a healthy, mature relationship, but a shaky house of cards.
Do I mean that to create a relationship you must be a professional in your field, free from worrying thoughts and not knowing personal problems? Of course not.
But do not forget that you deserve to be with someone who invests in yourself as much as you do in him. With those whose efforts will match yours. With someone who comes up and answers your love. With one who is a holistic person.
You do not need to complement each other – a full-fledged relationship is possible only if each of you is complete on its own.